Coping with violent trauma from the past during the holiday season

by Paul Arco
OSF Healthcare

ROCKFORD - The holidays are typically a time for joy and celebration with loved ones. But for some survivors of violent crime, the holidays can also be filled with stress, anxiety and memories of not-so happy times.

“For other folks it can be the holidays that triggers something because maybe you’ve lost a loved one to gun violence or you witnessed losing that person and you’re going into the holidays and yes, it happened 20 years ago; that doesn’t mean you’re not going to have the symptoms and side effects of that loss,” says Therasa Yehling, manager for the OSF Strive Trauma Recovery Center at OSF HealthCare Saint Anthony Medical Center in Rockford.

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Therasa Yehling

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Yehling says those side effects include anxiety, depression or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after a trauma such as gun violence, assaults, domestic violence, human trafficking and armed violence or robbery in which they are the victim or witness.

The events causing the trauma could have occurred two weeks ago or 10 years ago. There is no expiration date on the grief that happens as a result of violent crime, Yehling adds.

“When we talk to people we actually try to get a full picture of the trauma in their lifetime," says Yehling. "We’re finding that some people have had a lot of trauma starting in their childhood all the way up. Really then, a new traumatic event can stir up all the old stuff that maybe we’ve never dealt with and the symptoms of trauma have rendered that person almost catatonic and they can’t function.”

Yehling offers several basic tips for violent crime survivors during the holidays.

• Trust your grief and your healing
• Experience the grief and don’t run from it
• Say no to things that make you uncomfortable and form healthy boundaries
• Create new traditions
• Make a list of things you’re grateful for this year
• Do something kind for someone else

If none of those things seem to help or if these feelings are interrupting daily activities Yehling says it’s time to seek professional help as soon as possible. She does warn that seeking support will also mean doing a deep dive into what’s causing your feelings.

“I think people have to understand that if someone is going to talk about something very traumatic, such as sexual assault, domestic violence, human trafficking – it is important that they talk to someone who can help them through that process, therapeutically," says Yehling. "Otherwise you’re helping them to relive it and that’s about it.”

Yehling adds that our expectations of having the perfect time with family during the holiday season are often unrealistic. While that can be stressful enough, it becomes worse when you add the complexities of being a survivor of violent crime. Yehling encourages family and friends to go slowly and give their loved one the time and space they need to get through the holidays.

“I just think whether you have trauma or not everyone needs to be gentle and kind and supportive,” Yehling says.

For more information on help for survivors of violent crimes, visit OSF HealthCare.

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Key Takeaways: 

• The holidays can trigger emotions for survivors of violent crime.
• Violent crime includes gun violence, assaults, domestic violence or robbery.
• Side effects include anxiety, depression or post-traumatic disorder.
• Ways to cope include saying no to things that make you uncomfortable, create new traditions or do something nice for someone else.
• If nothing else helps, seek professional help as soon as possible.

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Summer camp for young burn survivors in Illinois June 18-24

MT. PROSPECT – For the last 32 years, Camp I Am Me has provided a place of acceptance and healing for young burn survivors throughout Illinois at its yearly Summer Camp, held at YMCA Camp Duncan in Ingleside. This year’s camp will be held June 18 – 24.

A signature program offered through Camp I Am Me, Summer Camp offers a range of activities for camper ages 8-20, in addition to specialized therapeutic sessions and support groups that empower them to be able to say, "I am me", despite physical and/or emotional scars that can result from receiving a burn injury.

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Photo provided

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In this judgment-free environment, survivors can feel more open to sharing their challenges with others who have had similar experiences. Campers enjoy activities such as wall climbing, horseback riding, fishing, a high ropes course, a talent show, crafts and more – that bring them together to be supportive of one another.

"Due to a generous network of sponsors, donors and volunteers, we are able to offer this unique and empowering experience free of charge to survivors of burn injuries due to fire, electricity, chemicals and even scalding water," said Jim Kreher, the Camp I Am Me President and Fire Chief of the Barrington Countryside Fire Protection District. "We invite anyone who wants to support our mission to get involved with this special journey of healing."

An overarching goal of Summer Camp, as well as other Camp I Am Me programs, is to help burn survivors build back their self-esteem and confidence. Over the last three+ decades, Summer Camp has positively impacted hundreds of lives, evidenced by campers coming back year after year, and the fact that more than a fourth of its volunteers are survivors who previously attended camp as a young person.

"It’s truly heartwarming to see how camp can positively impact these young people. It provides them with a strong support system filled with people who understand their experiences, which can change their lives for the better – both emotionally and psychologically," said Philip Zaleski, Camp I Am Me Executive Director.

Members of Illinois’ fire service and medical community, along with educators and individuals from the private sector, volunteer at the Summer Camp, where there is always a goal to have a one-to-one, volunteer to camper ratio. While Camp I Am Me has met its volunteer needs for this year’s Summer Camp, there are other ways to get involved with the organization’s mission, which can be found at campiamme.org/get-involved.

For more information about Summer Camp and other burn injury survivor support programs, as well as fire safety and burn prevention resources provided by Camp I Am Me, please visit campiamme.org.